More than a few parents find themselves aghast when their normally taciturn teenager says, “Mom, I think I want to take a gap year.” The words hang in the air as you try to keep your face neutral, but your brain has already taken off: Is she lost? Lazy? Scared of college? What will her grandparents say? Will she ever go back to school at all?

As parents, we spend years preparing our kids for college—tutors, test prep, endless campus visits, and a whole lot of pep talks. So when a child suggests hitting pause right before takeoff, it can feel like slamming the brakes at the edge of the runway.

But before shutting the conversation down, it’s worth taking a deeper look. Gap years are growing in popularity for a reason, and with the right planning, they can be transformative.

The Rewards of Taking a Gap Year

1. Personal Growth and Maturity
   A well-structured gap year offers teens the chance to grow up a little before entering the high-pressure world of college. Whether they’re volunteering abroad, working a job, or pursuing a passion project, students often feel that they have more clarity of their academic goals, better self-discipline, and a more grounded sense of self.
2. Academic Focus and Motivation
   Ironically, stepping away from academics for a year often makes students more eager to return. Many report greater engagement and improved performance in college after taking a break.
3. Real-World Experience
   A gap year can expose teens to work environments, travel, new cultures, or even just the basic mechanics of adult life (budgeting and laundry). These skills pay off long after the year ends.
4. College Admission Edge
   Some colleges (like Princeton and UNC-Chapel Hill) actively encourage gap years. If your teen defers admission with a compelling plan, it may even enhance their profile. Admissions officers increasingly recognize the value of life experience.

The Risks of Taking a Gap Year

1. Loss of Academic Momentum
   Some students find it hard to return to the rhythm of lectures and deadlines after a year off. If your teen isn’t naturally motivated or has no clear plan for their time, the gap year could drift into a permanent detour.
2. Financial Costs
   Depending on how it’s spent, a gap year can be pricey. International travel, structured programs, or unpaid internships often come with a hefty bill. It’s crucial to set a realistic budget and consider lower-cost options like work-exchange programs, AmeriCorps, or simply holding a job locally.
3. Social Disconnection
   Most teens go to college with their high school class. Waiting a year can mean feeling “behind” or out of sync with friends. For some, this matters; for others, it’s an opportunity to forge a new path more intentionally.
4. Planning Pitfalls
   A vague, unstructured year can do more harm than good. The key to a successful gap year is purpose. Whether it’s travel, work, volunteering, or personal development, your teen needs a plan—and likely, some parental support to follow through.

So, Should Your Teen Take a Gap Year?

The answer isn’t one-size-fits-all. Here are a few questions to discuss together:

• Why are they considering a gap year? Is there something more troubling going on?
• What does your teen hope to gain from a gap year?
• Is there a clear plan in place (or a willingness to create one)?
• Will they defer college admission or reapply later?
• How will they stay accountable and safe during their time off?
• Are you, as a parent, comfortable supporting their choice (financially and emotionally)?

If the idea still feels daunting, start small. Encourage your teen to draft a potential itinerary or connect with someone who’s taken a gap year. Most importantly, keep the lines of communication open. A well-planned gap year isn’t a retreat—it’s a reset.

Bierer is an independent college adviser based in Charlotte. Send questions to: lee@bierercollegeconsulting.com; www.bierercollegeconsulting.com